“We do not believe what we see; we rather see what we have already decided to believe.” We are programmed and imbibed many things that we are unaware of – The way we think, our beliefs, behaviour, characteristics and our emotional reactions. Above that, the mind always loves to hear good things that bring pleasure or pleasantness to it and doesn’t heed to hear advice, criticism and negative feedback. But if we want to hit a bull’s eye, we need to pay heed to the feedback with an open mind whether it is constructive feedback or negative feedback.
“Feedback is the breakfast of champions” – Ken Blanchard
Bill Gates, in his blog post, “A Teacher Who Changed My Life”. Gates fondly acknowledges the role of Mrs. Caffiere, the librarian, who helped spark his interest and instilled confidence. She enabled Gates, a timid, shy and nerdy nine-year-old to emerge out of his shell, encouraged and stoked his love for books. In one of his TEDx talk, he says, “98% of teachers just got one word of feedback “Satisfactory”. If my coach ever told me that I was satisfactory, I would have no hope of ever getting better.”
We need to listen to the feedback of others, not because they are intelligent and always right. We need to listen because, they may have more experience of being wrong or have gained their wisdom through their own life’s experiences. They may see things that we can’t see and may have different ideas that help us. Our thinking may restrict us to see our mistakes and opportunities. We can’t see our own face, and we need a mirror. Similarly, we all need constructive feedback in all fields and at all stages to know ourselves better, to improve and to stay on target, thus better achieve a goal or purpose.
Feedback is a wonderful gift we can get from people who care for us, but it is the most neglected and rejected gift. If we see biographies of great personalities, they would have mentioned at least one mentor’s name who changed their life. Feedback plays a vital role in one’s life. Asking feedback is an art and attitude. The simple technique to encourage is to say, “Thanks to you, tell me more”, “Happy to receive your valuable feedback.”
We keep getting feedback in different forms and from different people – parents, teacher, boss, subordinates, spouse, mentor, and even from our children. Only we need to open our mind’s eye to listen to those feedbacks to behold the treasure house of infinity within us. We can’t expect constructive feedback from all, and they may not know how to give constructive feedback. We need to be positive, the choices and decisions we make will set in motion a chain of reactions and will give us results corresponding to the choices we made.
“Feedbacks are the gateway of our success, Positive feedback for encouragement and negative feedback for improvement, seek feedback, choose wisely, and get growing.”
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